Oilers fire coaching staff

In the first move of the Oilers off-season, GM Braithwaite has relieved Tom Renney and Scott Gordon of their duties. GM Braithwaite, visibly drunk, declared at the press conference "Those two coachs have worked hard for this team, but it was time to move on. I have nothing bad to say about their coaching...except..." 

Braithwaite then proceeded to deliver a 43 minute tyrade on Coach Renney, trashing his defensive systems, his offensive systems, his break out plan, his special teams, and his command of the dressing room. At one point the GM of the Oilers even brought up Renneys suit saying it was "wild and capriscious." GM Braithwaite then google the word capriscious to ensure he used it correctly in his sentence.

When asked about Scott Gordon, GM Braithwaite responded candidly "Gordon is like a monkey on a unicycle on stage, it's fun to watch for a while because it's cute and he doesn't really know what's going on, but eventually you gotta thrown a banana at him, knock him off his unicycle, and get onto the next act." 

Braithwaite has not named a replacement for the vacancies, and has agreed to sober up before he does so.